Thursday, January 19, 2017

The Bitter Endings

One of my favourite sayings is "There are no endings, only new beginnings." However, I do believe that there are endings in there somewhere — the bitter endings. Like the shampoo or conditioner that you know is in the bottle still but won't come out. The last tiny chunk of bar soap that is still useful but oh so slippery and hard to hold onto. The split ends of your otherwise gorgeous hair.

Like all of these things, love has a bitter end. And, like the shampoo or conditioner that you know is still left in the bottle, you try to squeeze the last bitter ends out of it. You add water and shake it up and, although you do get some of the shampoo (or love) out, it is watered down and not as effective as it is at full-strength.

The bitter ends of love can be painful, frustrating, cleansing, cathartic, or just plain shit. Too much water, too much shaking, too much squeezing has caused there to be little of value left in the love you tried so hard to sustain, to keep going until the last drop is gone. It happens. But what is it worth to you as a lover? How hard should you work to get to the bitter end? How much strain should you put on something that is coming to an end anyway? You know it's ending, you see it, you feel it, you hear it, you FEEL it. There's less — less of everything that there used to be so much more of — affection, talking, agreeing, compromising, meals together, sincere apologies. And there's more of everything there used to be less of — arguing, crying, disagreeing, silence, bitterness, meaningless apologies.

Where do you go from the bitter end? Why, into a new beginning of course! It's a tough transition, difficult to let go of something, of someone and reach for something new and different to take up your thoughts, time, energy. But if you reach for something that you know is love, like an activity or a new hobby, or a new lifestyle, the transition from the bitter end into the new beginning will be less painful, less empty, more enjoyable, more fulfilling.

Reach for that new beginning as if your life depends on it. Reach far, reach strong, reach confidently. And then release the bitter ending as if it didn't exist. I will be there for you, to hold your hand, to help you reach, to make you reach for that new beginning that you desire but are scared to face alone. Someone will be there for you, with you, when you leave that bitter ending behind and turn towards the new beginning. I promise you that. And I don't make promises lightly, or hardly at all.

Reach for what you want, for what you know makes you happy, not bitter. Reach for your desire and leave the bitterness behind. It doesn't serve a purpose in your new beginning. It will only hold you back, prevent you from experiencing the best new beginning you've had thus far in your lifetime. Reach for your dream and hold on tight because you know you're going to be in for a great wild ride!




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